this has been a long break for me.....i'm back here after quite a few months.......its like moving into a new locality.....but once i realized that i have returned to my sanctum it looks all familiar now.....
i really have been very busy picking up the bits and pieces of my mistakes....some times you dont get what you deserve or the result is not upto your expectation....even though you have worked very hard for it.......well the truth is this happens all the time with me....i dont know why.....nothing goes my way smoothly.....unexpected barriers keep coming up infront of me.....i dont know why but this is just the way i have been facing life.....all 23 yrs of it till date......some times i think i must have made my usual joke or comments about the god of luck(if there is any...) and must have pissed him off pretty bad!!!!!!hehehe....
WTF do i care........will face whatever comes my way.......
well there is something i want to divulge here....sometimes how i feel....presently how i feel and how i pledge to do right........its a real personal feeling....if anyone reads this post other than me would not understand these last few lines......but anyways enjoy the next few......
its really good to be back in 'My S@nctum'!!!!!
running out...
hanging by the balance
never taking another chance
to let me endure this
a life of misery, without bliss....
bearing a wry smile
all my pains i file...
everything seems to fall apart....
every shred of luck running out!!!
the world around me seems to collapse
seeing others rise makes my pains relapse
brain drained of all zest
getting only jealous
never felt so desperate
time only making me more frustrate
trying to rebuild part by part...
my sanctum, whilst my patience is running out!!!
mistake too grave i've committed
with a dejected head i admit it...
price too heavy i'm paying
its a truth to which theres no denying
have only one last shot
to redemption, then alls lost
going down like a well fought bout
have to finish as my stamina is running out!!!!
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Sunday, December 20, 2009
well why not me.....
well why not me.....i can be sarcastic....well i'm mostly sarcastic...........my sense of humor is base upon my sarcasm and i tend to keep people around me pretty happy with it.....
but this is a different level of sarcasm.....here the joke is made of our lives...of the lives of those people who cant voice their grievances and of those whose grievances fall on deaf ears.....
some people tend to rise to fame riding on a facade and they seem to be pretty proud of themselves.....well this is about those ruthless bastards and those smothered millions and somethings more!!!!! its called THE TRIUMPH OF LIFE....
Triumph of Life
burning bright in the dark
fading away with a spark
colours of life turning grey
a darker shade everyday
stranger than fiction it seems
people claiming that life beams
love and happiness is whats all there
but their claims are overruled everywhere
riddled with pain and plight
we call it the Triumph of Life
Triumph of Life!!!!
every face bears a smile
preaching that all's fine
a picture so beautiful
humanity should be grateful
lifting up our hands
while the elite take up the stands
strugling for a nibble
smothering the feeble
with power and might
we call it the Triumph of Life
Triumph of Life!!!
on we cling
convinced that hope isnt a fling
ready to bleed and die
for glory even if its a lie
like a phoenix one rises
seldom and houses
in our hearts
despite all the hurts
with mettle without fright
we call it the Triumph of Life
Triumph of Life!!!!
but this is a different level of sarcasm.....here the joke is made of our lives...of the lives of those people who cant voice their grievances and of those whose grievances fall on deaf ears.....
some people tend to rise to fame riding on a facade and they seem to be pretty proud of themselves.....well this is about those ruthless bastards and those smothered millions and somethings more!!!!! its called THE TRIUMPH OF LIFE....
Triumph of Life
burning bright in the dark
fading away with a spark
colours of life turning grey
a darker shade everyday
stranger than fiction it seems
people claiming that life beams
love and happiness is whats all there
but their claims are overruled everywhere
riddled with pain and plight
we call it the Triumph of Life
Triumph of Life!!!!
every face bears a smile
preaching that all's fine
a picture so beautiful
humanity should be grateful
lifting up our hands
while the elite take up the stands
strugling for a nibble
smothering the feeble
with power and might
we call it the Triumph of Life
Triumph of Life!!!
on we cling
convinced that hope isnt a fling
ready to bleed and die
for glory even if its a lie
like a phoenix one rises
seldom and houses
in our hearts
despite all the hurts
with mettle without fright
we call it the Triumph of Life
Triumph of Life!!!!
Friday, November 20, 2009
Darkness.....
well we often feel that we r all alone in this dark and dirty world......we r standing alone somewhere and nobody is near us or even close to us....this is a pretty serious situation and this is what i have tried to describe here.....this just brings out the real loneliness that one faces and the ways that one craves to get out of it also.....also superstitions and misconceptions lead us to darkness of intellect and judgement.....more so a way devoid of any spiritual guidance or satanism can lead us into darkness...but whatever it is it stays along with us until and unless we try to redeem ourselves or correct ourselves to make us feel better...this way of redemption should come from one's own self and not through the guidance of some tom dick n harry........
so here is how it goes.......
Darkness...
standing alone in the dark
engulfed in loneliness
waiting for a bark
to know i am not the only one to caress
not a soul to be felt
not a ray of light
seems like i have dwelt
my entire life without a fight
in darkness of my faith
ignorance and blindness
filled with darkness!!!
trying to find a gleam
searching a way out
trying to see if i can dream
with eyes open, but its darkness all around
like a fallen warrior i try
fighting till my last
giving it all till the ultimate/last cry
but can see hope fade away fast
in the darkness of defeat
exhaustion and weariness
filled with darkness!!!!
so here is how it goes.......
Darkness...
standing alone in the dark
engulfed in loneliness
waiting for a bark
to know i am not the only one to caress
not a soul to be felt
not a ray of light
seems like i have dwelt
my entire life without a fight
in darkness of my faith
ignorance and blindness
filled with darkness!!!
trying to find a gleam
searching a way out
trying to see if i can dream
with eyes open, but its darkness all around
like a fallen warrior i try
fighting till my last
giving it all till the ultimate/last cry
but can see hope fade away fast
in the darkness of defeat
exhaustion and weariness
filled with darkness!!!!
Friday, October 16, 2009
err......
this is post is more of a self preservation or awakening post for me.....finally i have realized that i ought not to take any thing for granted and have to do all shit seriously......
i may be as care free as i can but wen its business i have to do it with full heart......
so this is for all that....its called....
what i have done???
never felt so alone,
never so deserted....
that i would be so
a glimpse never though of.....
minutes seem longer,
a week like an era....
what have i done to deserve this?
what have i done to be without bliss....
battered by fate
the test of gods i failed.......
riding high with arrogance
was too late in realising my ignorance
solitude, which i used to so crave
now feels like drawing me to the grave
what have i done to deserve such pain?
what have i done to want to fade....
learned the hard way
a price too dear i have to pay....
nothing matters any more
the same mistakes i'll make no more.....
will never let my guard down,
not a bed of roses now its known
what i have done i will redeem.....
never shall i ask this again!!!
the phase that i am going through presently is a pretty difficult one for me....
i hope to get out of this mess pretty quickly.....problems for me comes from all corners....outside and inside...sometimes it becomes quite difficult to manage all of them...but i still hang on waiting for that particular day when i can do whatever i think i should without having to look around....hehe!!!
i may be as care free as i can but wen its business i have to do it with full heart......
so this is for all that....its called....
what i have done???
never felt so alone,
never so deserted....
that i would be so
a glimpse never though of.....
minutes seem longer,
a week like an era....
what have i done to deserve this?
what have i done to be without bliss....
battered by fate
the test of gods i failed.......
riding high with arrogance
was too late in realising my ignorance
solitude, which i used to so crave
now feels like drawing me to the grave
what have i done to deserve such pain?
what have i done to want to fade....
learned the hard way
a price too dear i have to pay....
nothing matters any more
the same mistakes i'll make no more.....
will never let my guard down,
not a bed of roses now its known
what i have done i will redeem.....
never shall i ask this again!!!
the phase that i am going through presently is a pretty difficult one for me....
i hope to get out of this mess pretty quickly.....problems for me comes from all corners....outside and inside...sometimes it becomes quite difficult to manage all of them...but i still hang on waiting for that particular day when i can do whatever i think i should without having to look around....hehe!!!
Thursday, June 4, 2009
farewell to an era........
finally am about to graduate from college......this is supposed to be a big achievement and it sure is.....but y do i feel so depressed....the happiness of graduating has been marred by a sense of sadness.....it feels as though these past 4 yrs have passed in a bliss......though m graduating in a very troubled time but it feels that the thought of leaving this college hurts the most.....
for the past 4 yrs what i have done is to curse the gruesome mess food and the useless gate timing and the different restrictions imposed upon us by the proctor cell and the college administration.....
now it seems that these things will be missed the most......
it is in human nature to not appreciate what we have at hand.....this is the first time that i am realizing it....it sure is a wonderful feeling but it does make me feel sad......
as one by one my friends are leaving this place for the final time i am feeling a strange knot in my stomach.....as if i am afraid to leave this place.....never have i felt like this before, not even when i had to leave my home to come here.......this is really strange......i am at a loss trying to figure out why my emotions are acting like this.......neither can i confront them nor can i confide them to anyone....damn i wish i had a girlfriend!!!!!!!!!!
i have come to know many weird and wonderful people in this college........even learn tits and bits of lots of languages....these past 4 yrs really had been an unprecedented experience.......
farewell NIT,JALANDHAR.......i came here as a boy and now am going out as a man........
for the past 4 yrs what i have done is to curse the gruesome mess food and the useless gate timing and the different restrictions imposed upon us by the proctor cell and the college administration.....
now it seems that these things will be missed the most......
it is in human nature to not appreciate what we have at hand.....this is the first time that i am realizing it....it sure is a wonderful feeling but it does make me feel sad......
as one by one my friends are leaving this place for the final time i am feeling a strange knot in my stomach.....as if i am afraid to leave this place.....never have i felt like this before, not even when i had to leave my home to come here.......this is really strange......i am at a loss trying to figure out why my emotions are acting like this.......neither can i confront them nor can i confide them to anyone....damn i wish i had a girlfriend!!!!!!!!!!
i have come to know many weird and wonderful people in this college........even learn tits and bits of lots of languages....these past 4 yrs really had been an unprecedented experience.......
farewell NIT,JALANDHAR.......i came here as a boy and now am going out as a man........
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
reflections
this post is after a fairly long time......i would like to think this one a post that reminds us that we only get to live once. so when we stand at the very end of our journey in this world we should not think that we could have led our life differently and that what we have lived is not what we had intended to..............a bit philosophical i know and a bit uncanny for a bloke like me.......but still........
hehe......
when you were to die
you came to realise
you never satisfied
desires nor expectations
never played by the rules
never gave a flying fuck
wish you could change
those ideals so lame
wish you had played a different game
happier and solemn
less would have been the pain
less would u be so drained
like a barren tree you lay
without another chance
to revive what you glance
redeem or restore
reflections of a better life
reflections without others' grief
hehe......
when you were to die
you came to realise
you never satisfied
desires nor expectations
never played by the rules
never gave a flying fuck
wish you could change
those ideals so lame
wish you had played a different game
happier and solemn
less would have been the pain
less would u be so drained
like a barren tree you lay
without another chance
to revive what you glance
redeem or restore
reflections of a better life
reflections without others' grief
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